Thursday, May 03, 2007

Gratutitous Pop Culture Reference, I Guess

'YOU SHUT YOUR MOUTHS!' bellowed Uncle. Fortunately, they were talking about Shaft, so he could dig it.

I should point out that Uncle is not actually a floating torso -- that bit of the picture was cut out to make room for the original text. On the other hand, I didn't actually pay much attention to the original text -- it could have been about a sword-wielding floating torso for all I know.

12 comments:

hillhunt said...

"Is that it?" said Toby.

"Yes. Uncle Creosote's legendary pork sword. Impressive, isn't it."

Maisie knew different. But this was the 1940s and girls just shouldn't own up to knowing this stuff. Still, what the hell...

"Not really. Can he show us his beef bayonet?"

vincenzo said...

Day'um Pops. Why you go and disrespect me here in front of my peeps? This here is my posse: Argyle, Ascot Boy and my Nappy Headed Ho, T-Coat. 'Sup with the sword Cheeves?

Uncle: Grrrrraaarrrghhh...Mannn Uuu

Snoop Dawg: Sheeeit! Give me that magnifyin glass T-Coat. This fool must be coked up on GERITOL, 'cause he done chopped his shit off with that sword. Yo Unc, why you do this? Don't you like knock'n boots with Auntie?

THE CRUE LOOKED ON IN HORROR

Uncle: MAN U LOST YOU WIGGERS!

Snoop Dawg: You cut your shit off because of a soccer game? That is it...your AARP card is revolked.

UNCLE SLICES OFF BOTH LEGS

Snoop Dawg. That is some fucked up repugnant shit, Daddy-O. Make sure that you show 5-0 that penis. They might have a sewin kit. 'Cause when the torso finally hits the ground that shit is gonna hurt. Crue, let's get to steepin...don't want none of that penis blood on my threads.

hillhunt said...

Vincenzo, your spell-checker is fucked.

I think...

Baggypants said...

...but then Harry walked in with the enema funnel...

jacobmarley said...

"Out of the way boys, he'll be no match for my light-sabre."

"But Deirdre, you failed Jedi school. Why your so dumb, you have to have a big "S" stiched onto your fighting arm"

Jason - GorillaSushi said...

Not even Nancy Drew would speak of the day that there came to be only 2 Hardy Boys...

Anonymous said...

"You stay away from my daughter!!" Mr Murgatroyd bellowed, waving his cutlass menacingly.

"Oh Daddy," Nancy groaned, rolling her eyes. Wasn't it obvious what the boys were doing there? Three holes - three boys. Or had he forgotten that April day, back when she was twelve, when he first taught her what her holes were for?

bree said...

Capt'n Jack knew what those dirty conniving degenerate trannies where like around fresh meat. And this one was going to use that tiny Schwartz on HIS boys.

LeeLee said...

"Snooby-Mice!, Snooby-Mice!?!" Yelled Uncle Saunders. "I'll get 'em with my huge chopper." He yelled.
"Actually, uncle," replied Mavis, "I was examining the boys for pubic lice, and I think you will find that that there in your hand is actually a scimitar."
Fucking idiot She thought. Uncle Saunders had evidently consumed too many party-pills in his time. Do I win $10.00?

paul_star said...

the three backing singers moved protectively around cher as she gripped her microphone in terror.

soon the pop-hating man would find out the true fighting potential of three cornered homosexuals and a gay icon!

"BRING IT ON HETRO!"

:p

Andy said...

"You and your army of Annie Lennox clones will never prevail against the might of THE STASHED CUTLASS!"

"Damn you, I'm foiled again!"

Noah Brand said...

"Right, combat psychoanalysis. Middle-aged, overweight, probably impotent. Brandishing a sword at three virile young men... this is just a penis-substitute fight." Confident in her analysis, Elmyra produced her vibrator.