Tuesday, March 25, 2008

Nursey Knows

'Right there, do you see? That's where your soul would be, if only you were Catholic.'

13 comments:

AFPOE said...

Despite the rigor mortis, Eloise still loved the feel of her nursemaid’s cold fingers on her body. Eloise realized she must seize the moment—there was no telling when mummy’s perpetual gin buzz would dissipate enough to notice the smell of rotting flesh—and hiked up the hem of her dress.

Maracah said...

"Always the child patient, never the nurse..."
Once again forced to don the wee frock while Nan wore the fine apron and hat, Eloise reflected that it was exactly these moments that dwarfism truly sucked...

Fatmop said...

Maybe if you didn't cut the head off your nursey doll, I wouldn't be tying this so tightly, dear.

graboy said...

And when you're a big girl you'll have a booby here, and a booby there - and then all the boys will like you

amc32 said...

Helen Keller's parents initially had her tutored by a deaf-blind mute in the hope that familiarity with her condition would be helpful.
Naturally, it was a complete disaster.

Profitable Conundrum said...

Young Sally was far too innocent to understand the nature of the horrible plague that had come to her small village. To her it was all a new kind of game her nursemaid wanted to play. She approached and stood before her beloved auntie Clara as she had a thousand times before, only to be seized cruelly by cold fingers. The last words she heard were, “Brains!”

Anonymous said...

Is it even possible to escape the lolsex?

vincenzo said...

Young Arius didnt understand why nanny had put him in the dress, but it felt good. All the talk about souls confused the poor lad and he refused the trinity from the very start.

jacobmarley said...

"No, Nanny. I think you'll find that you CAN'T put me in the naughty cupboard before due process of the law and a fair trial is conducted. And even then I will be appealing to the European Court of Human Rights if necessary."

Shami Chakrabarti was a monumental pain in the arse from an eary age.

Anonymous said...

"It sounds like every one else has is at the party. Now, we just set the timer for ten minutes like this..."

( beep )

"...and by two o'clock you and all your little friends will be in Paradise".

Maracah said...

I must disagree with 1st Anonymous' "lolsex" comment: everyone has behaved rather well this round. There has been historical character reference, religious warp, dwarfism,zombyism, political snipe, and corporal punishment. And all submitted alongside the single pedo-necrophiliac entry.
Honestly - some anonymous people...

paul_star said...

"hee hee TITS!"

dorris the nurse was quickly sacked fr drinking on the job

Anonymous said...

AAAGGHH Perspective all wrong. Sewing basket; Nursey's shoe; Nursey's arse; Foot of chair; all drawn by M C Escher.