Thursday, July 05, 2007

Red Rag

As his friends ran to safety, Timmy prepared put his strategy into action: Using his umbrella to guard against splashback, he would douse the vampire bull in holy water, and as it writhed in pain, he would drive his stake deep into its heart, then step back and watch with an air of satisfaction as it crumbled to dust. Turned out it was just a regular bull. Sucks to be Timmy.

12 comments:

LeeLee said...

Too late, Timmy realised that the's been set up by the other three. It turned out that the 'super-douper anti-bull-rocket-launcher' they'd given him was merely a red brolly soaked in cow pheromones. It was going to be a slow, painful walk back to the dorms that evening...

Col Wilson said...

The baking soda and cola were working, soon the inflatible bull would reach critical mass... time to get out of here.

Timmy, as usual, was calm and collected. Timmy was ready.

(OK so this one's difficult)

jacobmarley said...

Little did he know at the time but this was to be a critical turning point in the career of young Michael Poppins. A few decades later and they could have sewn it back on...

...but in those days they had a misguided faith in leeches ...

... and a spoon full of sugar.

Björn Pål said...

Humm... the Bull-God is going to piss now... I better open my umbrella...

hillhunt said...

Billy was proud of his Young Orange Lodge outfit, and he was thrilled the other kids were afraid of it.

But this big thing was looking scary. It must be one of those Catholics that the Lodge Master had warned him about.

Surfline Tech said...

Watching his friends run screaming to the skin graft center, Timmy Gore carefully lowered his bronze umbrella. The last drops of acid rain washed away the buildings along Wall Street, leaving just himself and the bull to marvel at his good fortune. Uncle Al's constant warnings to always carry chemically inert protection were right after all.

Baggypants said...

Jack Poppins realised he had landed in the shit in more ways than one.

LeeLee said...

"Hey Timmy, here's a riddle for ya. What will go up your bum 'down', but won't come down your bum 'up'?"
"Jeepers," thought Timmy 'A talking bull."
It was then that he knew he just had to know the answer to this riddle...next week 'How to transport live gerbils through customs..."

vincenzo said...

There was no air of satisfaction on Timmy's face. NO...not on this day. It would be better described as shock. Yes Timmy found a new calling in life that day. On that day, he became Toro's Bitch. Toro would provide Timmy with Nerf banderillas for their games and by the end of their matches, he would also provide Timmy with extra holes to crap from...sucks to be Timmy!

Simon Heseltine said...

This was it, it was time for Timmy to test out his new Force Field Generator (which the salesman had explained, had to be disguised as an umbrella due to a legal issue). How they'd laughed at him when he'd bought it, but now he'd show them from the safety of his protective bubble.

Timmy fumbled for the on switch. The umbrella opened. As the realization crossed Timmy's mind, a wet patch began to grow on the front of his trousers...

Poor Timmy

Billem said...

Timmy, never thinking that it would rain bulls this afternoon should have bought a bigger umbrella.

Neomis said...

hmmm timmy blinked just at the right time next time he opened his eyes he saw a sexually satisfied bull walking away from him ...
poor timmy